Hornets Hype

In a basement. In our pajamas.

Archive for June, 2008

Can I Play, Coach Scott?

By on June 12, 2008

I was just looking through my pics from this season, and besides the one with Chris Paul that was on the front of the Hornets website, I think this (below) is one of my faves (although CP is in it, too, actually, now that I look closer). I just remember being like, “I want a picture of me on the Hornets bench!”

Of course you think floor seats will be cool…

At 5-6 am I the shortest Hornets bench player ever??

… aaaand then you realize you are sitting behind David West and you have to try to see over his back for most of the 4th quarter.

The Hornets are some big dudes

Unless this is my favorite photo from 2007-08:

The All Star logo I peeled up off the floor of the arena as we were leaving the All Star game. I had to box out a little kid to get my hands on this, too… got in there, threw an elbow or two, you know… (Oh, Ray, right back at you! I thought you were robbed for MVP. I said it then and I’ll say it now.)

Our living room is kickin’ it All Star style

Peja’s Hot WifeVia Dime, I present for your entertainment the NBA Finals Celtics-Lakers Wife Showdown. I about spit out my ravioli thanks to commenter #4, who says, “Once again Kobe’s teammates don’t provide him with too much help.” Haha. The Celtics are currently winning the poll.

All I can say is, damn, ladies. I’ve dated guys who were 6’5″ and 6’6″ and it was a major pain in my ass. You have to wear heels all the time just so more than your head is in pictures. Seriously. And I’m not even that short. (Actually, come to think of it, how tall are Luke Walton’s and P2′s girls? They’re the only two who come close.)

The NBA… where goofy looking men with hot wives/girlfriends happen.

Ticktock6: (watching Game 3 press conference) I think, of any player in the NBA, Ray Allen might be the most likely to have many leatherbound books. And his apartment smelling of rich mahogany.

mW: I’m sure he’s a genius.

Ticktock6: No, but I think he seems like one of the smarter ones.

mW: Yeah, like if you put him in front of a keyboard and he typed for 100 years he would maybe type Hamlet.

Ticktock6: Whatever, if Kobe Bryant typed for that long, he’d type, like, “Everybody Loves Raymond.”

mW: (laughter)

Ticktock6: Yeah, so WHAT-EVER.

P.S. You may wonder why I’m still updating this blog, albeit with random, random shit, now that the Hornets are done. Rest assured, it’s not that I don’t have a life… it’s that I don’t have a job. So like, imagine the 40+ hours a week you are at work, then subtract 10-15 for the hours I’m supposedly working on writing a novel (entirely unrelated to the Hornets but true), and… you know, that’s still several hours to be B.S.ing on the internet. And I’ve got 2 blogs, Facebook, and Twitter. I’m a terrifyingly useless human being. You have no idea. Anyhow, signing off to go pay the Hornets the $600 we owe them for the playoffs…. yes, really. (Actually I was pleasantly surprised. I thought it would be more.)

Great article on ESPN today about allegations that the league fixed Playoff series. Conspiracy theorists globally are feeling vindicated. Personally, I remember Jeff Van Gundy making allegations three years ago that he was told about league plans to fuck the Rockets and Yao Ming. He was fined $100,000 and then mysteriously retracted his allegations. The story disappeared. Until Tim Donaghy corroborated it this week. And then JVG reiterated his claims tonight on national TV, though stopping short of saying he would endorse Donaghy’s claims beyond that particular series. Of course, reading his body language, he was chomping at the bit to say more. Conversely, when ABC showed David Stern’s response, his body language was clearly uncomfortable with the lie he was uttering through forced smiles. That’s just my read. But the truth was in his eyes. You just have to look for it.

Another impugned series by Donaghy? Kings-Lakers 2002. Another oft-complained about series. And surprise, surprise, there were also allegations of favoring star players. Gee, really? In the NBA? What? By the way, someone found our site the other day using the search term “NBA referee steals game.” Yeah. Probably a Laker fan. While I make no excuse for the lameness of some Laker fans, the refereeing was definitely wicked questionable in Game 2. But, expect it to be lopsided the other way in L.A. to ensure a 2-2 split. Because as Donaghy makes clear, and anyone otherwise enlightened can see, the NBA cares more about a long series to ensure TV revenues and happy sponsors than who wins. Of course, that’s assuming both teams have superstars and big markets.

Right. But people will say Donaghy’s a rogue. He’s just trying to save himself. Right. His accusations are so implausible. Bullshit. They’re what most fans think most of the time but have no proof thereof. Which, of course, is the hallmark of a good conspiracy. So such logic says the Finals will start in Game 5. By then the refs, and Stern, won’t care who wins. They will have made their money.

 In case you haven’t already caught this over on Hornet247, Dariusz Ejkiewicz has put out a really sweet new JuJu wallpaper (considering I have his other one on my laptop and it looks like he is staring into my eyes with serial killer-like intensity, I might switch to this one!) I actually like the simplicity and the colors here. Comes in many sizes, so people can get their Mac on (or you know, whatever laptop you have that also uses these sizes).

1680×1050|1280×1024|1280×800|1280×960|1024×768

JuJu is Elevation

… I can’t help feeling like Hornets/Lakers would have been epic. Like we were slightly cheated. The Spurs were already more than half done when L.A. got them. I know there wasn’t a huge chance, but… sometimes I feel like we could have beaten the Lakers. We could have beaten the Celtics. Every time I saw one of these teams miss the connection for an alley oop tonight… I thought about Chris Paul.

We could have been great in the Conference Finals. We would have been great.

S-E-X-Y on the leftDefinition: Player who is not a member of your hometown/primary team, whose pure awesomeness you have come to admire thanks to watching the NBA playoffs. The Playoff Crush, unlike the real life crush, is not predicated on physical attractiveness but rather on some combination of the aforementioned awesomeness factor (see Game 7 vs. Cleveland), on-court personality, and other X factors that vary depending on the person.

Example: 1) I have a playoff crush on Paul Pierce, who I find inexplicably sexy despite the fact that he is, let’s face it, not really hot. 2) Many people around the internet were heard to proclaim their playoff crushes on Chris Paul when the Hornets hit the playoffs and you could actually watch them on TV.

Related Terms:

Playoff Man Crush: If you are a dude, what you have is a Playoff Man Crush. Right on, guys. Own that shit.

Footnote 1: How you like that blog hijack?
Footnote 2: I am not sure that there’s any Hornet player for whom, if you run a Google search, as many pictures of him at bars immediately pop up as do when you Google Paul Pierce. Haha.

The West Is The BestSo out in the ether of the world wide web, there is plenty of Hornets’ hatred for the Lakers. Go figure. Is it because CP didn’t get the MVP award and Kobe did? The fact of the matter is, that the award was CP’s to win, and whether he blew it down the stretch and couldn’t help his team seal up the #1 seed, or Byron instructed him to do so so that they’d have a better matchup in Round 1, he still lost it. Kobe earned it. There was no thievery there. Almost any critic in the league would tell you that Kobe’s the best player in the league, and has been for years. Most valuable? There’s plenty of room for argument there. But the answer, like it or not, for this year, is yes.

Maybe it’s jealousy because they got Gasol? But why? If the Trailblazers had offered us Brandon Roy for Adam Haluska, Rasual Butler, the rights to Birdman, Arvydas Macijauskas’ expiring contract, two first round draft picks, and cash, who would have said no? You can’t hold it to them for making a great trade. Leave the complaining to asses like Popovich, who said the league should banned the trade. Boo hoo from the guy wearing 4 rings.

Yes, I’m rooting for this guy…Maybe it’s the realization that we might not have beaten them the Lakers this year if we made it to the conference finals, and they weren’t even sporting one of their best players, Bynum. Or maybe it’s the gut reflex of knowing these are the guys we’re going to have to go through over the next four-plus years, and anticipatorily hating them for it. That I can buy. A rivalry. Let’s just hope we don’t end up like the Kings or Blazers from the years the Spurs and Lakers were taking home trophies.

Any way. The fact of the matter is that the Lakers are the Western Conference representative. So I’m rooting for them. I know I stand alone on this. There seems to be plenty of Boston love out there. (Thus the title of this post!) But not me. I still have a permanent scar on my head from the Garden. Fuck Boston. Besides, does anyone out there really believe that the Eastern Conference deserves a champion? Please. Come back when you can field eight playoff teams with a winning record.

More Goofy Tyson Video

By on June 6, 2008

Oh, see, someone must have known it was my birthday.

Who gave this kid a camera? The Hornets as a team are pretty goofy. Sniff. I miss them.

Quite the assortment of people on the Hornets’ boat.

Hornets: Gone Fishin