Hornets Hype

Here is a 100% true story from last night’s game.

Last night James Posey already had ten points in the second quarter, before injuring what was apparently his calf muscle. He was clearly limping on court. He was camping in the corner, and Chris Paul had the ball at the top of the circle. mW is like, “Chris! Call time out!” But here’s Posey and he can barely walk, and he’s waving at Chris like, “Yo! I’m open for three!” Because that is just the guy that he is. Tough as… you know, they always say tough as nails, but nails are actually rather easily bendable, aren’t they? Whereas Posey is not. Anyhow, he hangs on through the next possession and a half, and then heads for the locker room.

Now, I had been planning on purchasing his jersey in the team store at halftime, for a couple of reasons. First of all, he’s the only bench guy who has his jersey in the store, and I like to support the guy whose jersey everyone else isn’t wearing. I bought a Chandler one on the internet last year and was one of the only people who had one for awhile, because for some inexplicable reason the store wasn’t stocking them. Second, I think Posey is amazing and I want to be him when I grow up (which, you know, means I don’t have much time to get that amazing, since he is only 4 years older than me). So now I’m like, man, I don’t know. What if his ankle’s injured and he’s going to be out a while? Is it bad luck to buy the injured dude’s jersey? But I buy it anyway, a white pinstriped one.

I get back to my seat, and not a minute later, who comes loping out of the tunnel but Posey. And then a few minutes later, here he is checking into the game. I look at the scoreboard and wonder whether Chris Paul’s 24-8 so far is going to be in danger if I take off his jersey and put on Posey’s. I decide, clearly not. So I put on the new jersey. Posey goes on to score 19 points, and not just threes. I mean he was banging around in the post throwing up all kinds of crazy shots. Indestructible.

Fast forward to the end of the game. They have just finished the T-shirt gun thing. I have just finished ignoring it as usual. The players have come back on the court. mW is on his iPhone checking stats, and I am watching the screen as they announce Pose as the sub of the game.

At that moment something bangs into the glass between our heads. “Holy shit!” I yelled. It was a late shot (and I mean a way late shot– like the kind of thing where some guy brings his arm down and bludgeons some other guy under the basket 5 seconds after the play, and the ref blows the whistle and is like, “WHOA! LATE HIT! Foul!” Except in real life, not in the course of a basketball game, so really you could say it was a party foul) with the t-shirt gun, and it almost killed us. I am not making this up. We put Hugo on the Shit List for this. What the hell. That is seriously dangerous. No one was standing up, waving their arms. No one was looking that direction. The players were back on the friggin court! The deadly projectile ricocheted into the row in front of us. “Hey!” I yelled down to the guy who caught it. “That almost killed me!” And he tossed it up.

And so, James Posey = indestructible. Ticktock6 = narrowly escaped death while wearing the Posey jersey. Now, I don’t know if this all means anything. Take it as you may. But I am JUST SAYING.

P.S. I would be remiss in my job as Hornets blogger if I did not mention the most awesome thing in the history of Christmas, namely that they played a clip on the jumbotron of Mo Pete, Tyson Chandler, and Ryan Bowen singing Jingle Bells. Tyson didn’t do much besides announce the clip and then dance around in back of the other two who were doing all the work. Surprisingly (or not? he’s rather versatile) Ryan Bowen could actually sing. But Mo Pete was doing a nasty nasty beatbox, which totally stole the show. No, seriously, it was awesome. It was by far the best thing that has been on the jumbotron possibly ever. HORNETS ORGANIZATION– IF YOU ARE READING THIS, THAT WAS YOUTUBE GOLD. IT NEEDS TO BE ON THE INTERNET. IT BEGS TO BE ON THE INTERNET. Please either post it or send it to me!!

The James Posey replica jersey: If life was a video game it woud be +100 against CERTAIN DEATH

Posted in Hornets, Mo is Money, Pocketfulla Pose |

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