Hornets Hype

In a basement. In our pajamas.

Do Not Turn On NBA TV Today

By on December 30, 2008

No, seriously. Have you seen the ads for this? Because today is LeBron James’ 24th birthday, they’re doing 24 hours of LeBron, “a full day of around-the-clock LeBron-centric programming featuring games, highlights, classic performances and exclusive access to the Cavaliers’ superstar.” If you have NBA TV, you know I’m not making this up. It’s ridiculous. Here’s the network’s schedule for yesterday and today.

You know what? I have nothing against LeBron. He’s a great player. But the hype machine surrounding him is wearying. Handing out confetti to fans to throw like he throws chalk (a gesture which, as we’ve griped about before, he appropriated rather than invented)? Basketballs placed mysteriously all over the city of New York? I’m sick of him, and I don’t even think I’ve viewed more than one Cavs game this year. No, seriously. The only one I’ve seen is when they came to New Orleans Arena to play the Hornets. So explain to me how I’m so over him. Explain to me how I think, “Cavs… ugh” and switch to another game.

Could it possibly be the ubiquitous chalk commercial? Like, can I watch sports for 4 minutes without seeing this ad? Please?

So really, whenever I see the ad for this 24 Hours of LeBron nonsense, I just laugh. Because how is that different from every other day of life watching the NBA? Obviously, whoever came up with this campaign has a poor sense of irony. Or maybe not. Maybe they’re evil and trying to taunt us.

Really, my favorite thing about the NBA.com/Nike “Happy Birthday LeBron” article feature commercial is this quote that appears near the bottom: “I’m young,” James said. “But I’ve got an old soul.” BWAHAHAHAHA! That is just one of those things you aren’t really allowed to say about… yourself. Others can say it about you, yes. It may even be true. But how full of yourself are you, to claim that about yourself? I cringed reading that.

Whatever, NBATV. Way to completely whore yourselves out to Nike.

We can top this, though. Oh yes, HornetsHype.com can. What Hornet birthdays are coming up?

  • Tuesday, Dec. 30– Devin Brown: Oh, hey now, happy birthday, Devin! That must’ve sucked to be on the Cavs last year. I bet no one even got you a cake.
  • Tuesday, Jan. 13– James Posey: … Heh (pause)… Hehe… Now this is something I can work with. Stay tuned. Whatever, Nike. We’re gonna do twenty-FIVE hours of James Posey. Or wait, wait, wait. Are we doing it by age? Thirty-two hours of Pose! Even. Better.
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19 Responses to “Do Not Turn On NBA TV Today”

  1. Hornet-Saint says:

    Posey’s bday is 2 days before mine!

  2. we can show devins last 30 bricked 3’s, lol. just playing, happy birthday devin. you only get a golden birthday once. hopefully any minutes given you will finally hit a 3. you know what would be ironic, if byron sits devin today and plays mopete instead with devin not getting one minute. doubt it happen.

    back on topic, nbatv are a bunch of tools. its great nike has money to burn with the way the economy is going. everytime that lebron chalk comercial comes on i just change the channel only to find it on the next channel. so now i just hit the mute button.

  3. Thanks for reminding me! Now excuse me while I get some scissors to stab my face.

  4. It was either show 24 Hours of LeBron or 24 Hours of the same half-hour episode of Game Time, penis enlargement ads, kitchen time-saver infomercials and one non-memorable Sixers/Magic game from 1996.

    I’ll take LeBron, thanks.

  5. 32 hours of James Posey live blogging!

  6. @ two-tone: actually, Byron deciding to finally bench Devin, but happening to do it coincidentally upon, and stubborningly refusing to deviate from said plan, on his birthday, sounds just like our coach.

    @ the world. I say again. Viscount James. It’s his only title until Lebron does something other than beat up on the depleted Wizards.

    @ me: I really, really, hope I don’t choke on that last comment around 9:30 tonight.

  7. @mW: I almost made “THE BACK ROW CAN’T FEEL ITS FACE” as my sign today.

    But I figured not everyone would get it…

  8. Lebron’s quote should have read, ” I may be young, but that’s only because I changed my birth certificate.”

  9. Matt - Storm Surge says:

    Didier, not if you read the comments by the fan-tard fanboys.

  10. According to this LeBron has never even won on his birthday. He’s 0-3. Plus he got a speeding ticket driving back from the airport on his birthday last year after losing to us. HAHA.

    So can we all just agree to skip it next year?

  11. As a fan of the Hornets from the start i gotta say I love the Hornets but am not sure why this site is down on LJ, I want him to suck when he plays us but at least he’s a player who gets hype for things he’s actually doing rather than for what he once did. Maybe if you turned the hate towards players who deserved it it would be better. Instead of all that secret kobe love that keeps this site from being one of the best, cause as a Hornets fan I must insist that you just can’t like kb. As a Hornets fan it’s your job to respect those who have game on and off the court not who act like some diva bitching and moaning about your teammates, backstabbing whoever you can to get ahead and then say it was some master plan.

    It sickens me how you can hate one side of the spectrum and quietly praise the other less talented half. I tell people I’m glad we traded kb when we drafted him but how I’d gladly have lebron on our team instead of peja(sorry peja just been dragging this year) because he can do so much and if the pace of this game was at the speed of how it used to play he’d be a modern day big “O”. So lets show respect to the players who like CP3 are bringing an all around game on and off the court. Seriously I go to nba.com then hornets.com then here and if you are gonna have love for CP3 and kb that just doesn’t make sense because to truly understand CP you have to know what a good guy he is off and on the court. How he insists on making those around him better rather than whining like a girl(no offense tt6) about how they are not.

  12. That’s why I never read the comment threads at those sites. Great articles, but stupid readers. Like I care what some 12-year-old in Gary, Indiana thinks. Or some homer with the brain of a 12-year-old in Provo.

  13. @ Michael– HEY! At least half of this site has a strong distaste for Kobe. I take no responsibility for the opinions of the other half.

    I have no problem with LeBron as a player. His athleticism is impressive. Etc. I have a problem with the media circus that makes me tired of him. I have a problem with the 2010 obsession that I have to read about/hear about every day. There’s no REASON I should be tired of a player I’ve actually seen play 2 games tops this year!! Except that he’s just… everywhere. Where’s the point where constant self marketing begins to backfire?

    @mw, Didier, Matt– I tried to hold down the fort on that comment thread, but people like that aren’t worth arguing with

  14. I understand that but look at it this way, CP3 deserves to have a few media circus’s of his own but he doesn’t so I’d rather be watching 24 hrs of lebron(which i didn’t but just saying) than watching 24 hrs of……..don’t even want to say his name, and from now on I will refer to him as “he whose name will not be spoken”. I also recommend staying away from the lake fans on other sites half are immigrants who can only say “woo lakers” the other half are stupid high school dropouts who every year pick to like the team with the most wins

  15. @Michael: woo lakers

  16. Actually, I thought more about what I said above, and I think I now have to disagree with… myself. I don’t find Kobe likable, but I find him much more interesting as a person than I find LeBron. I just think he’s got a more complex personality and set of issues.

  17. If I had a dime for every time I heard an immigrant say, “It’s all about the Lakers homes.”
    The LeBron hype machine does piss me off than Kobe’s much more.

    It’s all about Chris Paul’s sexy pits for us, right guys!?

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