Otherwise entitled, “Dear lord, Hornets, you had two previous chances to hit that elusive .500 mark by beating weak ass teams like the Knicks and the Raptors and you lost both games. Well, tonight you have the reeling Bulls, who lost a game in which they had a 35 point lead AT HOME. I know you suck on the road this year, but come on.”
Look, Hornets, we need to talk. You want to be over .500, right? Well, mathematics says that before you can be over .500, you have to actually be .500. As in, at the balance point at which you have as many wins as losses. That’s just math, guys. Math is your friend. And yet you are treating it like it it not. You have been looking at math like it is some crazy nigh-un-overcome-able weird mental block. But it’s just math.
Or look at it this way. You are currently the 15th best team in the NBA. Yay for being incredibly average! Nay, the very definition of average. But there are some teams above you that you can be better than. You can be better than OKC (they’re .500). You can be better than Miami (they’re a one-dude team like you, and they’re in the East). You can be better than San Antonio (they’re not lookin’ pretty this year) and Utah (ditto). You could be better than Houston if you tried as hard as they do and had their coach (they got even more nobodies than you on their team and they’re 17-12!) Pass ONLY TWO of those teams and you are in the playoffs despite one of the more depressing starts in the league.
.500 game. Let’s try this one more time.
P.S. It’s Devin Brown’s 31st birthday on December 30th. Should I get him something?
Get that weak sh– outta here
Please give Devon a consistent 3-point shot. kthxbye
Yeah, so, .500… not gonna happen this year. But look, I got Devin Brown a 3 pointer! He hit 6 in the first half!
…. and none in the second half. Oh, you said consistent. Never mind.
When Devin Brown finally missed his (seventh?) three-pointer, even the Chicago Bulls commentators were amused. Something akin to: “well there’s the Devin Brown we’re used to.”
I laughed. Then realized we were down by 13.
I laughed too! I wanted to be all disgruntled but I couldn’t help it.
When Pargo came in, I cheered. Finally, we would get to watch him chuck up garbage but this time for the opposing team. Then Bobby Brown somehow must have touched him because BBrown started hucking them up in response. The cooks at Hooters came out to see why I was screaming like the wings were burning my intestines quickly instead of slowly.
le SIGH
I’ll take 6-7 from 3 for Devin Brown! Can’t you grant the hornets some interior offense and defense? 0-5 tonight and 4-17 his last game from Mek, DWest getting dominated when inside the paint… DAMMIT!
Also if you can help the team not suck on the road, that would be great. Yeah.
Thanks Santa TT6.
The no minutes for Okafor thing is starting to piss me off. We pay him money to sit on the bench with the 9-10 rebounds he got in the first HALF. Every night. Whoo, he wasn’t shooting well. I don’t care. Going small never won anyone anything.
Well, the Hornets need to treat him like Ben Wallace and never pass to him. He has the shooting touch of a jackhammer.
Well he certainly doesn’t have a shooting touch, but he can get points and get them efficienctly (despite the evidence of the last two games)… so no he should not be treated like Ben Wallace