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Archive for the ‘ D West Mothaf*@kas! ’ Category

Chris Paul Brings Da Ruckus

By on March 22, 2010

[Intro: Shogun Stern]

Hornets shadowboxing and the Chris Paul ball style
If what you say is true, the Hornets and Chris Paul could be dangerous

[Intro: Bower Robotnik]

Do you think Big D’s Carlisle-style can defeat us?
En garde, We’ll let them try our Hornets’ style

[Chorus: Buckets and Dimes da Fleur de Bee]

Bring da motherfuckin’ ruckus
Bring da motherfuckin’ ruckus
Bring da mother, bring da motherfuckin’ ruckus
Bring da motherfuckin’ ruckus

[Verse: CP3]
Grief Merchant, catch the blast of my hype verse
Speed bursts, I leave ’em in a hearse, I’ve done worse
I come rough, tough like basketball leather
Make your head rush and ankle snap, not so clever
Aw shit, Chris Paul clan spark the comeback
Over Big-D, quick cross-over like Magic,
Causin’ terror, my stare’ll damage your whole line-up
J-Kidd got locked the fuck up and left tryin’ to flop
Hornets style, hazardous ’cause we wreck this dangerous
I score points at this like Drew Brees and Reggie Bush.

[Verse: D-West]

I watch my back like I’m locked down
Hardcore bumpin’ low, watch me pick and roll and tear it down
A literate-type balla, double-double, no doubt
You watch all those corny Mavs’ playas fold
Yeah, they flop and all that, earnin’ stats,
But yo, my clan’s rollin’ like thirteen Killa Bees
Now your act contrived, I guess it makes sense
Chris Paul, his play’s sweeeeeeeeeeet, represent
I wait for Nowtiski to act up
Now I got him backed up; slap to his face now, react, what?
Meanwhile that’s one in the basket
Chris Paul tasked it, and I got 36 ways to jack it.

[Chorus: Buckets and Dimes da Fleur de Bee]

Bring da motherfuckin’ ruckus
Bring da motherfuckin’ ruckus
Bring da mother, bring da motherfuckin’ ruckus
Bring da motherfuckin’ ruckus

[Verse: Peja 13]

I rip shots hardcore like porno-flick bitches
Rollin’ with a team of ballas with mad riches
Check it, my method on the ballcourt’s bangin’
Hornets floor moves leave your mouthpiece hangin’
Bust this, I’m shootin’ like Seagal in Lawman, can’t miss,
The roughness, yes, the rudeness and ruckus
Redrum, I athletically assault with the hot hand
Murder-one – my style shot your knot like a machine-gun
I’m hectic, I wreck it with the quickness,
Pass the rock, and da competition get blown
By this nasty-ass playa – Lil’ Buckets will own you,
Chargin’ like a bull and bringin’ the ruckus
He be bad, ragin’ up the floor with the fab, no crab
Dribble drive, I scream on your ass: “bring it on…”

[Chorus: Buckets and Dimes da Fleur de Bee]

Bring da motherfuckin’ ruckus
Bring da motherfuckin’ ruckus
Bring da mother, bring da motherfuckin’ ruckus
Bring da motherfuckin’ ruckus

[Verse: Oak]
Yo, I’m more rugged than my Bobcats roots
Our new recruits and me fuckin’ up invading troops
I break loops and trample fools while I stomp
A mudhole in that ass, cause I’m straight out the swamp,
Creepin’ up on Nola, now it’s Ladies Night for us
And my Hornets’ style is mad fuckin’ dangerous
More deadly than the stroke of an axe
Choppin’ through outstretched arms, *swish*
Givin’ bystanders heart-attack harm
Playas try to flip, tell me who is at the 5, him?
I blow up his fuckin’ zone, make it a vicious act of terrorism
You wanna bring it, so fuck it
Come on and bring the ruckus
I provoke players to make buckets
I’m makin’ ’em wet, but I ain’t sweatin’ my fame
Who’s sellin’ gain, I’m dishin’ out a deadly game
It’s not the Mavericks, it’s the Chris Paul hip-hop roulette
Slip up and get played like a sucka at the net.

[Chorus: Buckets and Dimes da Fleur de Bee]

Bring da motherfuckin’ ruckus
Bring da motherfuckin’ ruckus
Bring da mother, bring da motherfuckin’ ruckus
Bring da motherfuckin’ ruckus

[Outro: Aaron the Incredible Bulk]

So bring it on…
So bring it on…
So bring it on…
Punk ballas.

An Ode to Don Nelson

By on March 18, 2010

Hornets aren’t as good as they have been the last two years and Dallas I mean Oakland I mean Golden State I mean fuck (which team are we again), well, my team has gotta take advantage of these fools without CP3; it’s our big chance to run a team ragged and let our talent lag get lost in the run and gun style we run without their ability to sub, you know, with all their injuries–wait, what, our injuries, our short bench?  Don’t worry about it.

Tip.  We win.  That Ju-kid steals it and quick foul, take it out of bounds and then they score?  That was quick.  We got our own tricks, ha ha.  We’ll just let Anthony Tolliver score the first  14 of our 18 points.  D-Leaguer?  Not anymore.  Won’t see him coming.  Okafor two quick fouls.  Sucker!  Oh wait, we don’t have any bigs either.  No answer to David West inside or out, why is he running and working hard on defense?  It’s a waste of time.  (He’s killing us, though).  We’re running up and down, though; what more could you want (it’s a game of attrition, how could this not work?).   Songaila fouled makes both free throws. Damn!  Who would have thought it?  Hornets up 4 at the end of the First: got ’em right where we want ’em.

That Marcus Buckets kid’s supposed to be special?  He’s 0-1.  Mwwwahaha.  We’ll shoot him back to the bench.  Wait, what, we’re 2-8 from 3?  Shit.  Keep shooting.  Buckets 0-2 now.  What’s that, Smart, West is 8-15 for 18  with 6:18 to go in the Second?  What the fuck? Chris Paul looked good in warm-ups, think he’ll suit up at halftime?  Maggette’s jumper is falling.  That’s something  Thank god West picked up foul 2 and is finally sitting.

Posey in. Is that good or not?  Old, flu-ridden bastard.  Que pasa, Silas?  Zero offensive boards and our best rebounder has 2?  West has 8 and Songaila 4?  Don’t worry about it.  C.J. Picks up foul 3.  Shit.  Wow, that Thornton 3 was a curveball. How’d that go in?  Finally get a fast break our way and Posey holds Ellis, holding up the break, no call?  Whatever.

Collison pull up 3 with 32 seconds left in the Second for the 2-and-1, didn’t he do that at the end of the First?  Well at least we’ll, aarrrrggghh!  Just….Wright cross court for the buzzer-beater.  Never mind.

West picks up his double-double forty seconds in.  Thunder dunk from Okafor.  Damn.  We’re losing?  I guess it’s because we can’t hit anything from 3.  Cut in then, ah, see you missed.  Oh, wait, another way late whistle? Sweet, we’ll take it.  Steal, there we go.  Wait, did C.J. just pass it to Bower? Fuck!

Why does that Mo Pete keep hitting 3s?  That’s our thunder.  HOLD ON.  11-3 run, that’s what I’m talking about. What, Turner, we’re still down 13? Shit!  But the crowd’s back into it now.  Hornets lead down to 9. Keep it gunning, guys. Wait Mo again?  What’s with that guy?!  Steal to end the Third and Devean George dunks it home.  Yeeeahahahah!!!

Run keep going keep going run and shoot 3s and yes that is what I call coaching suck it now because we’re tied, bitches!  Mo Pete fouled on the 3. Misses all 3 FTs!?  Wouldn’t have happened if he had jacked that shot up quicker!  Back now to us, up 2, 34-11 Warriors run!!!   Wait, why did that Buckets kid score 2 in a row? I thought he was taking it off tonight?

Another 3, this one missed. So what? That’s not the point.  What is with that David West?!?  Ah well, defense is overrated.  We’ll just keep shooting to defend him.  There we go, Reggie Williams hits another three. He hit over 40% in the D-League, why would he shoot any worse now?  Can’t make a 3 you don’t take.  (Weird how the Hornets were killing us with their bigs and then went small.)  30 point swing in the last 10 minutes or so. And they say I can’t coach.  We’re shooting 9-11 from 3 in the Fourth. Now that’s coaching.  If we can just shoot this well every game, no one will be able to beat us.

Beat the Hornets by 10.  Let’s party like it’s 1999 or I’m coaching against Avery.  Nothing as sweet as your nineteenth win.

Conversations... with D West and Co.

D West: For the love of god, if you lose Anthony Morrow one more time I am going to come over there and kick your ass. I’ma slap you in the face like Dirk.

Pose: But–

D West: Shut up, Pose. Man, what is up with you this month? You give away and-1s like they’re candy. Defensive stopper my ass. And what happened to your three?

Pose: I just hit a three. It was a big one.

D West:  You have made 6 field goals in the last ten games.

Pose: That can’t be true. Total?

D West: Total. Let us not forget how you only played 10 minutes against Memphis and managed to rack up five fouls and lose the game in the last 7 seconds.

Pose: Aren’t you guys over that? It was last week.

D West: No one is over that. Back me up here, Darius.

Songaila: No one is over that.

D West: Marcus?

Marcus: Were yall talking? ‘Cause all this talking is getting in the way of me scoring.

… after Jeff Bower inexplicably benched David West (15-5) for the entire 4th quarter of a tie game, in which the Hornets leading scorer (CP3) was out having knee surgery and the game’s leading scorer (Thornton, 22 pts) had just fallen hard and gone to the locker room, I might have done something like this first:

Shortly followed by something like this:

Would it have changed the fact that the Hornets blew a game they should’ve won to one of their closest competitors for a playoff spot, because their rookie head coach decided it would be a fun time to teach his longest tenured player and 2-time All Star a lesson? No. But it would have made me feel better.

So, I guess it’s a good thing they don’t let me go to press conferences.

I have to go. I’m, literally, an incoherent ball of rage right now. ^%$@#I*YFGSDFHJSG&$#TRA^TRDS

  • Hoops Addict got David West to talk about Michael Eric Dyson, the media, and Byron Scott (although he doesn’t really bite on that one, haha) in a nice interview
  • Twitter suspended the fake (and BRILLIANT) Devin Brown for “suspicious activity” yesterday … and there was much sadness
  • My fun report (with pics!) about Chris Paul’s bowling event (no spoilers, though) should be up soon
  • Dime Mag has Marcus Thornton listed as one of their Top 5 Second Round Steals
  • As a resident of New Orleans who experienced Hurricane Katrina, I think we all should be concerned about the devastation in Haiti following the earthquake. Personally, I will always remember the people who sent me checks or donated clothing (try living in Boston in winter without any socks and see how that goes for you… of course I didn’t bring socks when I evacuated, I barely wear socks here) or furniture (we had an empty apartment with one mattress until a lovely couple I didn’t even know donated us their extra stuff). So if you have anything extra to spare, consider donating to Yele (Wyclef Jean’s foundation), or you can make a $10 donation to the Red Cross by texting “HAITI” to “90999? (it’ll be added to your phone bill). I am sort of sketched out by the Red Cross, however, because I believe they are not guaranteed to use your money for a specific disaster. So alternatively, you might want to consider Doctors Without Borders, Unicef, or even, to keep it basketball related, Sixer and native Haitian Samuel Dalembert’s foundation. He personally gave $100,000 and is apparently matching any donations made at the Sixers game tonight.

Caption This Pic

By on December 31, 2009

Hornets Hype: Specializing in Awkward Situations Since 2007

Hornets Hype: Specializing in Awkward Situations Since 2007

Oh, you thought I was gonna post about the game? Nah. The Hornets won. ‘Cause they were at home (12-3). It was good times.

Westitude of the Day

By on October 20, 2009

You might have already seen this on Hornets247 but I’m gonna go ahead and post it anyway. It’s a nice little interview with David West about the offseason and various roster changes. West is not the most animated dude, but I always find myself enjoying listening to him talk. I think it’s his deep reassuring voice. Haha.

Surprising: Craig Sager’s suit is actually not that hideous. Unsurprising: D West has his D West face on.

I had meant to post this a couple weeks ago. It’s something David West did for EA Sports. I really liked it ’cause I think you’ll agree it’s a little more of D West than we usually see.

Still Standing

By on April 2, 2009

The Beastitude of a True Fighter

The Beastitude of a True Fighter

A lot of us die-hards were dealing with disillusionment in the aftermath of Friday’s loss to the Knicks. I think it was the point when some of us finally said goodbye to this season’s playoff hopes. The team came out of the All-Star break on a tear, traded Tyson Chandler, got him back, went on a 7-game winning streak, lost Peja, lost Tyson again, had a chance to steal the division lead from the Rockets at home and failed miserably, won too-close games against weak teams, and then had another chance to leap a spot in the standings against the Nuggets at home and failed miserably. Roller coaster, right?

Losing to the Knicks, in a game where Chris Paul stooped so low as to engage in trash talk with the likes of Nate Robinson … James Posey got ejected and suspended for chucking the ball at a ref … the team performed a complete 180 and decided to entirely abandon defense in the second half… seemed sort of like an end. It seemed like we were able to exhale that breath and finally come to terms with the fact that a team that could lose, and worse, lose like that, in the middle of a tight playoff race was just not a contender. And I’m ashamed to admit it almost felt good to let go of that, after all the injuries and disappointments of this season. I wondered on Twitter whether it would be better to save money by not buying playoff tickets, since we were one and done anyway.

And so it was that on Sunday I arrived at the Spurs game thinking, “Okay, we’re not going to win. No Tyson. No Peja. No Posey. I’ll just have some beers and enjoy being here. Enjoy the games we have left.” It’s a slow process, letting go of a season. The cracks appeared early. The .500 start. Then they got a little deeper. The home loss to the Warriors. The 4th quarter meltdown against the Blazers. Then they dropped the Knicks game on Friday. And suddenly, there it was in front of us, what we should have seen all along.

It was right after tipoff that I glanced up and realized that the arena was full. And I mean really full. People stacked to the top of the upper bowl. And not quiet people, either. This became apparent in the first two or three minutes, when a weak foul call on what looked like a Tim Duncan flop was met with a roar of boos.

So I guess at this point I should explain the hangup I have about this team. Which is that, every time they go on a losing streak, I get completely freaked out. Because we’re not that far removed from last season, when no one was coming to games. And part of me is just terrified that if the team fails this season, people will give up and stop coming. I do not want this team to leave New Orleans. I will fight and scratch and throw elbows for them not to leave this city. I will do whatever I can to prevent that from ever happening. I started this blog because I felt this so strongly.

On Sunday, I looked at the people hanging over the edge of the upper deck and it hit me, and I thought, “Oh my god. The city still believes in this team.” The crowd was roaring and the adrenaline was blazing and I’d forgotten how that could be.  And the Hornets were winning. They had no business winning. I don’t think anyone I talked to that day even bothered to entertain the thought of them winning. I mean, we were all just there for the beer. I thought to myself at that moment, “I would trade three losses to the Knicks for what I saw in this building tonight.” And it’s a sentiment that doesn’t make sense when you’re racing for playoff seeding. You can’t trade three games for one game. It’s a feeling I can’t explain. Maybe I’m just a junkie for this team, but I meant it. Five days later, I still mean it.

It’s stupid, right? Because how I feel can’t impact what happens in these games. What is a crowd, after all, but a lot of people yelling? But we do care. And we feel disillusioned and mad and cheated on the nights when it seems like the team doesn’t care. Because when we come to games, come yelling till we’re hoarse, come wearing the team colors, come booing and cursing and refusing to sit down, we’re putting a bit of ourselves out there and into the game. And we want to feel like we’re getting something in return.

We just want something we can feel proud of.

The team gives David West a standing ovation

The team gives David West a standing ovation

And then, as if we were even expecting it to be taken up another notch after the Spurs game, in stepped David West.

I’m not sure this was appreciated by the national media, because how many people watch Kings or Clippers games? Surely not many. But the dude could barely walk on a messed-up ankle, let alone run. And he drops 40-9-6 on the Kings. He comes out of the game with just a couple minutes left and we think, surely he’s done. But suddenly Sacramento throws up a crazy shot, and the Hornets are down one with just 1.7 on the clock. And there’s David West, checking into the game, wincing. And yet he holds off two Kings defenders so Rasual Butler can get that one shot. And, well, we all know what happens then.

This is what I say.

It’s time to stop waiting for the team of potential greatness that exists in my head to show up. It’s time to love the team we have. The one that’s fun but terribly flawed. The one that sometimes seems a little too laid-back and underachieving. The one that the rest of the country gave up on a long time ago. Because they wear New Orleans on their shirts, and when you think about it, they’re not so different from this city, are they?

What it comes down to for me is this: Any team that can come out and fight like what I saw this week, I will follow to the end.

So let’s go there. 74 down. 8 to go.

Remember the All-Stars

By on March 29, 2009

Okay, folks.  Tough order today.  A fully healthy Spurs team against a depleted Hornets squad.  No Tyson.  No Peja.  Posey suspended.  Hilton is gimpy.  This would be a tough game at full strength, let alone with what we have.  So can the Hornets win?  I don’t know.  But I know one thing.

Chris Paul and David West have to go Nova.

Nova TalentNo iffs ands or buts.  Well, unless we put up like 18 three-pointers, but Butler, Mo, and the rest of the cast haven’t seemed to have been putting up that many lately, let alone making them all.  But otherwise, if our two All-Stars don’t rip it up, well, it’s back to the Ledge for Hornets fans.  (Speaking of, haven’t seen those Phoenix people lately…where they at?)  But I don’t see our guys failing.  Win or lose, these two are going to leave it all out there.

CP and DX understand that this isn’t just another game to put one in the win column.  This isn’t even important because it’s a Western Conference or Divisional game.  Nope. This is the team that knocked us out of the playoffs last year.  On our home court.  In Game 7.  It’s about revenge.

We can all say that we have good “character” guys, who don’t care about things like that.  But I say that’s bullshit.  These guys are competitors.  They get angry.  They harbor dark feelings.  You may not see that side of them in interviews or at charity events, but if you watch our guys on the court, they have that dark fire in them.  So tonight, I hope they will unleash that dark side.  They’ll need it.