Hornets Hype

In person, this looked like he was hugging him around the waist. It was heart-warming and stuff.

Besides this picture.

• Aaron “BIG NASTY” Gray and his random yet masterful D-ing up of Dwight Howard in the Hornets win over the Magic on Friday
• The Hornets giving away a prize a day this month, which you’re eligible for if you renew your season tickets (oh all right, fine, the reason this is on this list is because I won something…)
• Marcus Thornton’s game-icing three on Friday. Everyone had already risen to their feet before he took the shot. It was a moment! It was fun!
• D West’s 40-10 game. Mr. West is in the building! (for people who don’t come to home games, this is the sound clip that plays after every D West bucket… this is its first season. At first I didn’t like it but it’s sort of grown on me. His prior clip was “Wake up, Mr. West-est-est!” Good thing we have Kanye around to provide D West with all his nice beats.)
• Darren Collison’s last 5 games: 24.2 pts/7.6 ast in 43 minutes (43! Oof… CP! Come back!)
• Marcus Thornton’s last 5 games: 22.6 pts/4.8 reb/shooting 49% from the field (seriously) and 43% from three in 32 minutes. Can we please please please put more emphasis on per minutes stats instead of points per game? The Buckets Monster is crazy good at what he does (get buckets) and his stats still look like crap from all those games early in the year when he got 5 minutes of garbage time. Boo.
• Crazy comebacks! This team doesn’t die.
• Myself and mW went to a Hornets season ticketholder dinner on Thursday and Jeff Bower told us that CP is “one to three weeks” away from returning. He’s shooting and riding the bike right now and progressing well in his therapy. Chris Paul himself, when interviewed by ESPN last night, said he doesn’t plan to come back until he’s “110%, because of the style of ball I play.” Let’s hope he’s smart about this!
• THE MARDI GRAS BABY IS GONE! It wasn’t at the game Friday.
• Last night I had a totally weird dream that was probably the result of playing Mass Effect 2 all afternoon and then watching basketball: I dreamed that, while scanning a planet, we unlocked an upgrade that would turn Darren Collison into Chris Paul. Now I’m all fascinated by what kind of an upgrade that would be… “Sticky Gloves — your Shepard holds onto the ball better for 30% less turnovers.” “Prothean Visor– plus 15% to court vision.” “Mental Quickness Implant– you are now a veteran, working the refs in a craftier manner for a 10% free throw bonus to your entire team.” Oh, the possibilities! (Wow, I need to stop gaming… just kidding, no I don’t…)

My non-favorite thing about this week/weekend was the losing. Boo losing. It ruins everyone’s fun. Let’s not do it anymore.

Last time I checked, Mardi Gras was over yesterday. And yet… and yet… I could not believe my eyes when, at the Hornets/Jazz game last night, I looked up and beheld the Cousin of Chucky, with its slightly less terrifying friends the King and the Jester, lining up for its nightly scooter race. When will the terror end, people? WHEN WILL IT END?

Look at its FACE. You cannot tell me it doesn't mean me harm. I won't believe you.

It’s not just that, deep within my soul, I am afraid of this diabolical creature. I now suspect the Baby is causing us to lose. I think (I could be slightly off on this, but hold on, because the stats are still going to bear me out whether I’m off one or two games or not) the Baby made its first appearance in the Clippers home game on January 13th..

Prior to that, the Hornets had an impressive 14-3 home record, enough to rival top teams in the conference and especially impressive considering they were an under .500 team. Since then? SINCE THEN? 3-6. Oh, Chris Paul is out? I call B.S. Chris Paul was out in late November/early December when the Hornets were winning all those home games. Oh, the schedule is stronger? I call B.S. again. The Hornets have recently lost to the likes of the Bulls and the Sixers at home. They even at one point had lost four in a row, something that hasn’t happened all season.

I hope that little boy was still in possession of his soul when the baby was finished with him... No, seriously, I'm really worried about him. This pic gets bonus points for how friggin EVIL the Jester looks. I hadn't noticed it before because I was focused on the baby but wow.

Here it is on a scooter

Thanks to reader Robbie, who emailed me pics, we now have more photographic evidence of the Baby’s existence. Serious props to him. Photographing the Mardi Gras Baby is akin to catching the Sasquatch on film. Actually, I’m surprised it even shows up on camera…

While you’re sitting around waiting for the Super Bowl to start (WHO DAT!), check out Chris Paul’s bowling event, which airs on ESPN today at 2 PM EST/1 PM CST. Here’s a preview:

The Mardi Gras baby creeps me right out. Here, a rare photo of the elusive creature in the wild. Any small children sitting in the vicinity of the courtside seats, I am sure, shrieked in terror at the sight of it.

I’m sure those of you on Twitter have heard me talk about the crazy life size Mardi Gras baby that’s been appearing in one of the Hornets’ timeout “entertainments” during carnival season. Well, last night I put the call out on the Twitterator for someone to send me a picture of it, and here it is.

This description of the phenomenon is from Toney Blare’s SLAM Online recap of the Spurs/Hornets game a couple of weeks ago:

During a break, there appear in the crowd three mascots, each with a large plastic head: a king, a baby, and a jester. We are within breathing room of Mardi Gras, when you eat King Cake, sort of like a super-sugary circle of cinnamon roll. Inside each cake is a small plastic baby, and whoever finds it buys the next cake. Let me say, it gets out of hand in offices all over town for upwards of a month. Now, I’m telling you all of this because I can’t imagine what the Spurs must think. The three mascots “race” down to the court, the baby looking especially ghoulish and slow. They circle through some yellow cones, with the King winning by crossing a purple finish line held by Hugo the Hornet and the Geico Gecko. I didn’t mention him until the end, because he really was the most innocuous of these newcomers. That baby actually scared me, like the clown from IT or some sh*t.

I am not gonna lie, this thing freaks me right out. Maybe it’s because I am also irrationally terrified of the creepy Burger King that lurks around women’s windows in the commercials like a plastic-headed peeping tom. This baby looks way too similar to that for me to be comfortable with it. Maybe it’s like how some people have a fear of clowns. Either way, you better believe that my uneasy truce with the Mardi Gras baby is SOLELY due to the fact that I sit in the last row of the lower bowl, far enough from the court to feel fairly safe from it coming after me.

The baby always loses the race, by the way.

We just had to say congratulations to New Orleans’ other team. Geaux Saints!

And, um, there might be a small, temporary change in the header…

About a week and a half back, I got a ticket to attend the ESPN taping of Chris Paul’s annual celebrity bowling event. Well, here’s my big shiny recap of the day, complete with pictures. Be warned, though, since this is going to be on TV, I can’t tell you who wins. But believe me when I say the ending was about as exciting as you can get in bowling.

The trophy

Upon my arrival at Harrah’s Hotel to catch the shuttle to the event, I immediately see Ludacris wander out (on the phone) and stand right next to where I am. He’s wearing sunglasses and a red leather jacket with his name stitched on it. (I tweet: “Ten minutes ago I was standing right beside Ludacris. He DEFINITELY is not tall. He may be shorter than me.”) Jack Del Rio, coach of the Jacksonville Jaguars, was also there to bowl, as well as LaMarr Woodley and Hines Ward of the Pittsburgh Steelers. (Tweet: “Am standing beside Hines Ward and LaMarr Woodley. I guess they are football ppl or something. They’re not very tall.”) I’m not sure what my strange obsession with celebrity height is. It just seems that every time I meet someone I expect them to be tall, and they’re not. Haha.

Everyone was waiting around for Chris Paul to arrive. Which he did, quite ironically, as I was leaning on a column in the hotel lobby tweeting on my Blackberry about how none of the celebrities were tall. He literally strolled through my field of vision about two feet away. It will probably not come as a shock to you that he is not tall, either. Chris Paul is wearing a Yankees cap and a pair of navy and orange Nikes. I immediately decide to start an obnoxious Twitter rumor about him signing with the Knicks.

We hopped on the shuttles to the event (I was on the one with the Hornets people and PBA people, not the celebrities), which was held on the Belle Chase Naval Base. The audience was basically all servicemen and women, in uniform, and some of them brought their kids. The minute we got there I realized A) the place was really, really small, and B) I was sitting in the front row. I was definitely going to be on TV at some point. Yuck. I pulled my stuff out of my bag and began to furtively tackily do my makeup. Meanwhile, the celebrities and the PBA bowlers they were matched up with started to warm up, as the ESPN crew gave instructions to the crowd.

Jason Belmonte, Pete Weber, and Ludacris

This was the first TV taping of anything I’ve ever been to. I can tell you that it was mostly three things: 1) Hot, 2) Long, and 3) Late. Everything was late. It started late. It ended late. Mostly this was due to the “commercial breaks” they built into it, even though it wasn’t live. So the guy would get on the loudspeaker and tell people they had ten minutes to get food or go to the bathroom. And whenever he did this, the entire audience would– you guessed it– get up. And then it took forever to get everyone back in their seats and continue with the tournament. The event started with a play-in round between Jack Del Rio and LaMarr Woodley to see which of them would be on the fourth team in the main tournament. (I’m not sure that part is going to be televised.) But after that, we didn’t get to take any more pictures, so as not to spoil how it all turns out. Yes, I know who wins, BUT I’M NOT GOING TO TELL YOU. Muahahaha… Chris Paul, however, has never won his own tournament, which, considering the supercompetitor that he is, must really really irk him, so I can tell you he was gunning for it.

Chris & Ludacris

One of my favorite moments involved little CP, Chris Paul’s baby son who was sitting with his parents two rows behind me. At one point, Chris was about to bowl, and little CP starts loudly going, “Da-da! Da-da!” The whole place was silent, so everyone heard him. Chris turned around and gave him a smile and a little wave. Then he bowled a strike. It was super, super cute. My other favorite moment was when Hines Ward dived down the lane on his stomach after making a really big shot. The guys were being goofy and making it fun to watch.

The only other Hornet who made an appearance was Peja, who came for a bit with his five-year-old son. He actually sat right behind me, which is a nice way of saying his knees were in my back because it is really hard to sit on bleachers when you’re 6-10. This is the point in the broadcast where you will definitely see me, because they do a close-up of Peja and put his name up on the screen. And lo, there I will be, trying to look like I’m not looking at myself on the screen across the way. Chris Paul came up and sat behind me and talked to Peja for a bit. Peja was mentioning a present CP had gotten his son for Christmas, I think, and saying his son wasn’t really into basketball (he knows that his dad plays but that’s about it) but ever since then he talks about Chris Paul. Aw. Peja and his son, by the way, do not speak in English to each other.

I did get introduced to and shake hands with both of them. Chris Paul was his usual polite self. I mentioned I had met him before when I won a video contest, and he said, “Oh, that’s right, the MVP video.” (I think this is more a function of there being only one video contest in the last 3 years than Chris Paul having an OMG AMAZING MEMORY, so don’t get too excited. Haha.) I was sitting right in front of the whole Paul family and friends contingent, and they were all very nice.

Me and Hines Ward after he tried to cut me off. Haha

Afterward there was a reception at Harrah’s Hotel. We chatted with some fans, random people, and Hornets employees. I had an entertaining conversation with one of the biggest name-droppers I have ever met (seriously, this guy deserved an award). Hines Ward and LaMarr Woodley amusingly parked themselves at the bar and made themselves the center of the party, chatting and taking pictures with just about everyone who came up to get a drink. They also kept pushing pineapple juice and vodka (ew!) on people. I have one funny celebrity story from that night, and here it is: I went up to the bar to grab myself a drink. After declining the pineapple and vodka, I mentioned that I was going to have one drink, because I had to work the next day. It was only 9:30 at that point. Hines asked me what I did for a living, that I had to be up at 6:30 AM for. I told him, and he informed me he was going to order the perfect drink for me. He turned away for a second, and then turned back to me with…. a bottle of water. I said, “Wait, did you just cut me off?” Him: “Yup.” Other appearances at the party included local artist Amanda Shaw and Danny Glover, who strolled in in a long trench coat and had everyone excited, even Chris Paul.

The event will air on ESPN on Super Bowl Sunday. I recommend watching or DVR-ing if you like:

• actual PBA bowling
• Chris Paul
• glimpses of Ticktock6 looking goofy on national TV
• exciting endings that go down to the very last frame

Below the cut, a gallery of pictures from the event (they’re big, so Scary Loading Time Warning). Huge thanks to Matt of Storm Surge Photography. Please contact him and not me if you’d like to use any of them on your site:

[More]

• Hoops Addict got David West to talk about Michael Eric Dyson, the media, and Byron Scott (although he doesn’t really bite on that one, haha) in a nice interview
• Twitter suspended the fake (and BRILLIANT) Devin Brown for “suspicious activity” yesterday … and there was much sadness
• My fun report (with pics!) about Chris Paul’s bowling event (no spoilers, though) should be up soon
• Dime Mag has Marcus Thornton listed as one of their Top 5 Second Round Steals
• As a resident of New Orleans who experienced Hurricane Katrina, I think we all should be concerned about the devastation in Haiti following the earthquake. Personally, I will always remember the people who sent me checks or donated clothing (try living in Boston in winter without any socks and see how that goes for you… of course I didn’t bring socks when I evacuated, I barely wear socks here) or furniture (we had an empty apartment with one mattress until a lovely couple I didn’t even know donated us their extra stuff). So if you have anything extra to spare, consider donating to Yele (Wyclef Jean’s foundation), or you can make a $10 donation to the Red Cross by texting “HAITI” to “90999? (it’ll be added to your phone bill). I am sort of sketched out by the Red Cross, however, because I believe they are not guaranteed to use your money for a specific disaster. So alternatively, you might want to consider Doctors Without Borders, Unicef, or even, to keep it basketball related, Sixer and native Haitian Samuel Dalembert’s foundation. He personally gave $100,000 and is apparently matching any donations made at the Sixers game tonight.

It’s funny, I spent so much time getting hyped up for “THIS IS THE .500 GAME GUYS, AND WE HAVE THE KNICKS/RAPS/CRAPPY TEAM!” only to have the team continue to lose. And then the Hornets end up getting to .500 in about the most unlikely and unpredictable way possible: 1) On the road, where they were 2-13, B) Against the Jazz (yes, I consider the Jazz the most unlikely road win, even over the Lakers. The Hornets have put together some great wins in LA). And then they actually went into OKC and put in a nice balanced effort last night to string together their first road win streak of the season and a 4-game win streak overall.

It wasn’t until about ten minutes after the game ended that I realized the Hornets were a winning team for the first time this season. I think At the Hive put this aptly when he observed that this year the Hornets have “a very random resilience.” I don’t know if it’s having young rookies with fresh legs come off the bench or Byron Scott getting fired or what, but the Hornets aren’t caving and getting steamrolled when things aren’t going their way quite as badly as they were in the beginning of the season or even last year. They’re winning games they aren’t supposed to win. They’re taking care of business at home. They’ve got to be up there at the top of the list in terms of the percentage of close games they’ve played in/won this season. (Hello, stat people? Does this observation have validity?) And they’re winning games against teams that are ahead of them in the standings, ie: the teams they need to beat to grab a playoff spot. And they have the Nets this Friday.

And… oh, what the hell. Go team.

P.S. I’m going to be at Chris Paul’s bowling event this afternoon. It’s being taped to air on ESPN in February, so I can’t tell you who won or anything. But check my twitter @ticktock6 for updates!

Well played, Hornets. Well played.

Unstoppable (Adjective): 1) Incapable of being stopped.

Chris Paul could not be stopped tonight. He had 30 points, 19 assists, and 9 rebounds. He was 7-7 in the third quarter. He was inside, he was outside, he was in the lane (finally, yes, we can all exhale a bit to see him dominating from there for the first time since his ankle injury), at the line. There was a stretch of the third to fourth quarters in which he had 22 out of the Hornets 24 points. There was a point when the Nuggets made a mini-run to close the gap, and Chris Paul checked back into the game, and his very presence, solely by being on the floor, was magic.

And there it was, in the building tonight, the Thing We Don’t Talk About. The players knew it. The fans knew it. And then in the fourth quarter I noticed something. Namely that Darius Songaila and Emeka Okafor weren’t on the floor, which was a little unusual. And that Devin Brown was, which was also a little unusual (but unsurprising considering neither Collison nor Thornton had a good showing tonight). The Hornets went with a crunch time lineup of Paul/West/Posey/Stojakovic/Brown. I think it is not coincidental that those five guys were all there last April, and were playing inspired and scrappy ball tonight. I think they wanted to close this out. And I think they deserved to.

If you’ve ever seen the movie The Sting, it’s about two con men who get revenge on a big mob boss by running an elaborate con and cheating him out of a quarter million dollars. But, the one character warns the other, taking the boss’s money isn’t going to be enough– it’s not going to change the past. And at the end, the other guy turns to the first guy and says, “You’re right. It’s not enough…. But it’s close.”

Where we semi-regularly give you the best pickings from the Hornets twitter feeds. What’s up with the guys? Well, the weather’s been on their minds, just like all of us regular people. (IS IT GOING TO FREAKING STOP STORMING EVER? Seriously. This is the second straight week.)

@oneandonlyCP3:

Mornin evrybody, headed to shootaround…did anybody else in NO hear that mini hurricane that ripped thru the city last nite?? CRAZY STORM

#igrewupon Starter Jackets (I had the Charlotte Hornets n my bro had Chicago Bulls)

“WHEELS DOWN back n NO…tough loss 2nite against a good Mavs team…we hav to get off to better starts wit our starting 5…which is my job!”‘

@mopete 24: (Hmm, wonder what happened… this tweet just makes me crave a baked potato.)

Had an AWFUL customer service experience today at Port Of Call restaurant in New Orleans. I wouldn’t recommend anyone to ever go there.

@jujubee32:

“Man… It’s raining lions and wolves in the N.O! Don’t even want to drive in this weather…”

“Why is there a huge elephant statue in my subdivision?!?! http://twitpic.com/tn9zx“

(‘Cause ya live in next to somewhere over there Plaquemines Parish, son. Get used to that thing. It’s always parked around there. Haha.)

@Bbrownsix was a little freaked out by the weather, and even posted a vid from what appears to be his rooftop window (And, since New Orleans isn’t exactly a large city, we now know which building he lives in. Haha). He’s also got a new custom background by @ejkiewicz_com.

This rain and wind just woke me up… All I gotta say is Wow!!!!!!

Man I dnt kno wat just hit the NOLA but it was crazy… I need to get back to LA… Geesh

Where I’m from I’m use to Eartquakes and a lil bit of rain.. Not mini Hurricanes and Thunderstorms…Oh Dipppppppppp!!!!!!!

It’s gettin pretty ugly outside…. http://twitvid.com/9E29E

New Orleans Arena Where Amazing Happens!!! Gametime vs Kings.. Let’s get this one fellas…

And, my personal favorite Bobby Brown tweet:

Popeyes…. Where Amazing Happens lol….

Yes, Bobby. Yes, it does. Plus a bunch of the Hornets team and staff went to the Cowboys game on Sunday while they were in Dallas to play the Mavs, and they took a pic on the field:

CP, the Browns, Emokafor & Hilton and Hornets staff

Well, it’s been… random. Follow Chris Paul, Morris Peterson, Bobby Brown, and Julian Wright for more Twitteratin’ fun.