Hornets Hype

‘Cause here at Hornets Hype we like legal stuff (or, um, to make fun of legal stuff), and we like the Hornets. Rarely do two worlds collide… until today. And, well, you know, we always enjoy hilarity. Check out the following excerpt from a question on a recent bar exam, which features a few familiar characters:

Chris walks into the locker room AND STEALS EVERYTHING!

I love it. Chris is age 23 (and earning more money than he ever thought possible), and he’s committing burglary and thievery left and right. Sounds like someone we know. And he steals Tyson’s cash and gun out of his locker.

But wait! The (hypothetical) story  doesn’t end there!

Chris' spree results in Peja's untimely death

Oh no they didn’t! I’m sure we are all very saddened by the unfortunate death of Peja at Chris’ dastardly hands at the Hard Wood Tavern. I guess Peja is easily startled. That Chris. Always stealing stuff and causing heart attacks. HAHA!

Who’s the mysterious “Dana” though? And Chris moving to an out of state location to pursue better employment what? Bitch, please. You’ve been reading the Dallas paper, haven’t you?

P.S. You also spelled “discreetly” wrong. Bar exam fail! Good thing I quit law school, so I can have the free time to skip pleasantly through life bashing others’ spelling and grammar to my heart’s content.

Via this thread at Hornets Report.

The Beastitude of a True Fighter

A lot of us die-hards were dealing with disillusionment in the aftermath of Friday’s loss to the Knicks. I think it was the point when some of us finally said goodbye to this season’s playoff hopes. The team came out of the All-Star break on a tear, traded Tyson Chandler, got him back, went on a 7-game winning streak, lost Peja, lost Tyson again, had a chance to steal the division lead from the Rockets at home and failed miserably, won too-close games against weak teams, and then had another chance to leap a spot in the standings against the Nuggets at home and failed miserably. Roller coaster, right?

Losing to the Knicks, in a game where Chris Paul stooped so low as to engage in trash talk with the likes of Nate Robinson … James Posey got ejected and suspended for chucking the ball at a ref … the team performed a complete 180 and decided to entirely abandon defense in the second half… seemed sort of like an end. It seemed like we were able to exhale that breath and finally come to terms with the fact that a team that could lose, and worse, lose like that, in the middle of a tight playoff race was just not a contender. And I’m ashamed to admit it almost felt good to let go of that, after all the injuries and disappointments of this season. I wondered on Twitter whether it would be better to save money by not buying playoff tickets, since we were one and done anyway.

And so it was that on Sunday I arrived at the Spurs game thinking, “Okay, we’re not going to win. No Tyson. No Peja. No Posey. I’ll just have some beers and enjoy being here. Enjoy the games we have left.” It’s a slow process, letting go of a season. The cracks appeared early. The .500 start. Then they got a little deeper. The home loss to the Warriors. The 4th quarter meltdown against the Blazers. Then they dropped the Knicks game on Friday. And suddenly, there it was in front of us, what we should have seen all along.

It was right after tipoff that I glanced up and realized that the arena was full. And I mean really full. People stacked to the top of the upper bowl. And not quiet people, either. This became apparent in the first two or three minutes, when a weak foul call on what looked like a Tim Duncan flop was met with a roar of boos.

So I guess at this point I should explain the hangup I have about this team. Which is that, every time they go on a losing streak, I get completely freaked out. Because we’re not that far removed from last season, when no one was coming to games. And part of me is just terrified that if the team fails this season, people will give up and stop coming. I do not want this team to leave New Orleans. I will fight and scratch and throw elbows for them not to leave this city. I will do whatever I can to prevent that from ever happening. I started this blog because I felt this so strongly.

On Sunday, I looked at the people hanging over the edge of the upper deck and it hit me, and I thought, “Oh my god. The city still believes in this team.” The crowd was roaring and the adrenaline was blazing and I’d forgotten how that could be.  And the Hornets were winning. They had no business winning. I don’t think anyone I talked to that day even bothered to entertain the thought of them winning. I mean, we were all just there for the beer. I thought to myself at that moment, “I would trade three losses to the Knicks for what I saw in this building tonight.” And it’s a sentiment that doesn’t make sense when you’re racing for playoff seeding. You can’t trade three games for one game. It’s a feeling I can’t explain. Maybe I’m just a junkie for this team, but I meant it. Five days later, I still mean it.

It’s stupid, right? Because how I feel can’t impact what happens in these games. What is a crowd, after all, but a lot of people yelling? But we do care. And we feel disillusioned and mad and cheated on the nights when it seems like the team doesn’t care. Because when we come to games, come yelling till we’re hoarse, come wearing the team colors, come booing and cursing and refusing to sit down, we’re putting a bit of ourselves out there and into the game. And we want to feel like we’re getting something in return.

We just want something we can feel proud of.

The team gives David West a standing ovation

And then, as if we were even expecting it to be taken up another notch after the Spurs game, in stepped David West.

I’m not sure this was appreciated by the national media, because how many people watch Kings or Clippers games? Surely not many. But the dude could barely walk on a messed-up ankle, let alone run. And he drops 40-9-6 on the Kings. He comes out of the game with just a couple minutes left and we think, surely he’s done. But suddenly Sacramento throws up a crazy shot, and the Hornets are down one with just 1.7 on the clock. And there’s David West, checking into the game, wincing. And yet he holds off two Kings defenders so Rasual Butler can get that one shot. And, well, we all know what happens then.

This is what I say.

It’s time to stop waiting for the team of potential greatness that exists in my head to show up. It’s time to love the team we have. The one that’s fun but terribly flawed. The one that sometimes seems a little too laid-back and underachieving. The one that the rest of the country gave up on a long time ago. Because they wear New Orleans on their shirts, and when you think about it, they’re not so different from this city, are they?

What it comes down to for me is this: Any team that can come out and fight like what I saw this week, I will follow to the end.

So let’s go there. 74 down. 8 to go.

This is a public service announcement for the national basketball media. You are allowed to talk about Rasual Butler. No, seriously. I officially give you permission.

I’ve been mulling over this post in my mind for some time, thinking, “Damn, we should really do a post on the resurgence of ‘Sual this year,” but the moment it leapt to the forefront of our priority list was when I was watching the NBA on TNT last week. I’ve already ranted a bit on Charles Barkley’s rather uninformed comments about the team, but what really got me was how dismissive he was of Butler. Actually, he didn’t even seem to know that he was starting for the Hornets. And never mind the disparaging snarky comments I’ve heard from several different announcing teams, “Well, I guess you have to wonder with the Hornets how far you’re going to get when you have Rasual Butler starting, ho ho ho.”

OK, freeze. Rewind.

Last season around this time was when Byron Scott finally gave up on Butler. Hornets fans breathed a sigh of relief. Finally we could stop cringing as #45 launched up brick after brick. It was almost inexplicable, how a player’s shot could so thoroughly desert him. It was like Devin Brown in November/December of this season, but worse. (If you want a full perspective on how bad I am talking about, at one point Brown was shooting 15% from three. So we are talking bad.) Butler didn’t even suit up for the playoffs. He only played in 51 games, for an average of 17 minutes per game, most of those minutes in the beginning of the season before it became apparent how brutally awful of a year he was having. He averaged 4.9 points per game over the course of his truncated season. Add an offseason gun arrest into the mix, and Hornets fans were left wondering if there was a way to trade a guy who had zero value and made $3.6 million.

OK, stop. Fast forward.

In 2008-09 the man Hornets fans have begun to refer to as “The Phoenix” is starting for the Hornets. (Helpful hint to the national media, who seem to be having trouble locating him: He is the dude out in the corner who is not Chris Paul, David West, Tyson Chandler, or Peja Stojakovic.) He plays a career high 30 minutes a game and averages 11.2 points. The fact is, Rasual Butler is doing a better job than Morris Peterson (8.0 PPG) ever did last season. And in 2009, he has absolutely been lighting it up.

Check this: Over the Hornets’ last 10 games, ‘Sual Bop is averaging 18.2 points per game on .496 shooting. Your resident fact checka is here to inform you that that’s a better percentage than Kobe Bryant and Ray Allen are currently shooting over the same 10 game split.

So he’s not one of the top shooting guards in the league. Like, whoo. Who does your team start at the 2? OK, don’t answer that question. I realize the Hornets have a different situation than many NBA teams. The fact is that not every team has a Chris Paul, whereas there are many dominant shooting guards in the league. Of course if you’ve got one, the offense is going to be run through him. So when you go to evaluate a guy like Rasual Butler, who effectively plays the role of the 4th or 5th wheel on the Hornets, as opposed to other 2 guards who are a bigger part of the offense, you will need to make some adjustments. At the Hive has done the numbers on this, analyzing where Butler fits in with other shooting guards when you adjust for usage rate. (The answer is 2nd in the league, behind Utah’s Ronnie Brewer, making ‘Sual a pretty efficient dude for the touches he gets.)

Too bad he’s like the Invisible Man over here.

I’m not asking you to proclaim him the next big star or anything like that. I’m just asking you to recognize that here’s a guy who, at the age of 29, is quietly playing the best basketball of his life. But you know, maybe it’s OK that everyone’s not talking about Rasual Butler. You just go right ahead and leave him open to swish shots over your head. Maybe it’s enough that Hornets fans recognize and appreciate him. And honestly, we might understand him a little more, and on a little deeper level, than the average NBA observer anyway. His success this year, while uplifting, means more to us than to you.

In New Orleans, we know a little something about rising from the ashes.

Chris Paul was quiet.

He’s been quiet for the past few games, content to dish and wait as David West played the leader role. His shooting looked a little off; maybe he was still feeling the pull of the groin injury. We weren’t concerned. We shouldn’t have been. But maybe the Mavs should have.

Because you don’t want to see Chris Paul quiet. It’s like the still, humid, blue-sky day before a hurricane.

And then it was the third quarter.

Interlude: So this is what happens on TNT after the Blazers/Nuggets game. First off, the TNT crew has been unnecessarily ripping on Portland all game, saying stuff like, “The Nuggets need to beat these teams that are vastly inferior to them.” Uh, Portland was half a game back. Seriously, guys? Biased much? I was already rolling my eyes at that. Then they bust out with, “Everyone on the Hornets is worse except for Chris Paul, who is the same. They all had career years last season. We don’t have the stats on that, but… they’re worse. And they don’t win unless he averages 25-15.” Which completely ignores the injuries, the recent fire that’s been lit under them, the 8-2 streak out of the All Star break, and the fact that Rasual Butler (remind me to do a post on this) is invisibly playing the best basketball of his entire career, after being a DNP-CD most of last spring. I was glad to see Barkley back, but I forgot that he’s so irritatingly changeable. (Chuck’s statement is also a rampant exaggeration, as ESPN’s Daily Dime and Elias Sports Bureau more factually stated this morning that “It was the ninth time in the last two seasons that Paul had at least 25 points and 15 assists in the same game. That’s one more 25-point/15-assist game than all other NBA players combined have recorded over the last two seasons.”) But the gist of the exchange is that, according to TNT, the Hornets are “out.”

Really, Chuck and Kenny? You’re gonna straight up tell Chris Paul he and his team can’t do something? You must not be watching the same Chris Paul I’m watching. And, while we’re at it, you’re wrong on another count too. He’s better than last season.

Back to the game. It’s tied 45-45 going into the third. You probably saw what happened next. At one point in the third quarter, mW remarked that it was like that scene in Happy Gilmore (which was fresh in our minds after being on TV approximately sixteen times last weekend) where he’s like, “Nah, I’m just gonna win now.” And then he does.

That was what it was like.

8-2 since the break, and 6-0 since Tyson came back. And I guess I feel sorry for the dudes on TNT, for Bill Simmons, for all these people who write these articles focusing on the wrong thing with this team, that they can’t just sit back and appreciate the whole “We’re getting the band back together!” what-the-hell vibe of it all. That they can’t see these past weeks for what they are– something rare and precious and swaggering and fun in these dark times of “sports as business” and “teams as cap space.” Just a bunch of guys who thought they lost their chance to play together… and then, against all probability, got it back. Just a bunch of guys playing for each other and racing to climb a ladder against time.

And then I realized something. I realized that, no matter what happens in the offseason, no matter what cost-cutting moves are made, if you live in New Orleans, it’s getting to the point where it isn’t a choice whether to buy tickets. I get the “let’s boycott the team because of Tyson Chandler” kick some disillusioned fans went on a couple weeks ago. Believe me, I get it. It’s a grand sentiment, but it’s a terrible idea.

Why do you go to games? For me, part of it is the lure of the tantalizing possibilities that lie spread out before you at the 12:00 mark of the first quarter. It’s about the chance– the slim, elusive chance– that you might see something transcendent. That someday you might be able to tell people, “I was there. I was at that game.”

‘Cause, see, last night I saw Chris Paul decide about halfway through the third quarter that he was going to win that game. He didn’t say it in words, but he said it in a thousand other ways– with a glare, a behind the back dribble, going through Jason Terry’s legs, a laugh and a spin. When Chris Paul asks you if you wanna dance, you say yes. And when he says he’s going to win, you believe him.

Really, at what point does it become less a question of expectation and more a question of plain mathematics? Like 2+1 is always gonna equal three. It’s 77 degrees in New Orleans, and Chris Paul dismantled the Dallas Mavericks last night. We’ve been here before.

Just some stuff traveling through a series of tubes.

• The people over on DIME debate who’s better, David West or LaMarcus Aldridge?
• Tyson Chandler blogs about his wife dragging him to the Britney Spears concert last night, how awesome David West is, and his daughter inflicting torture on his baby son, among other topics.
• We ain’t signing any of those guys who got waived, ’cause they’ve all been signed.
• CP3 at the Foot Locker on Canal Street tonight at 6.
• True Hoop’s investigation of the NBA’s traveling rule. It’s several posts long, and it’s fascinating.
• This isn’t Hornets related, but it’s one of the most hilarious things I read last week. I’m not sure how many of you are on Twitter, but Shaq’s Twitter feed is one of the funniest things out there. He’ll occasionally bust out with things like, “I’m at the bus stop at ___ and ____. First person to tag me gets 2 tickets to the Lakers.” What should his next Random Act of Shaqness be? This post  has some wickedly fun ideas about what The Big Shaqtus should instruct his followers to do, such as:

“yo i hate broccoli. every 1 go 2 the grocery stores, buy up all the broccoli, and burn it. there will be no broccoli in phoenix 2 nite. yur man shaq”

“im at the busy intersection downtown. any twitterin drivers here? if there are, shut off yur ignition and calmly walk away from yur cars. it will cause hours of gridlock and bring the citys infrastructure to a halt. in accordance with my master plan. peace”

And on that note, I’m out trying to create mass hysteria via my Twitter feed…

Tired Pose smiley ’cause it’s too early to be up.

Apparently this happened during one of the trampoline dunks at the Pistons game Wednesday, but I completely failed to notice at the time, even though I sit right behind that goal. Which, I guess, says more about how I feel about “in-game entertainment” than about my observation capabilities. Or maybe it says more about how spaced out I was after six days of Mardi Gras…

I just heard about this and got kind of excited. I’ve been wondering when they would make one. As you can see, it’s a nice bright yellow with a beehive design on the front and pictures that spell out “Horn-Net-Fan.” I like that it’s a little bit cryptic, a secret message you have to figure out. Not quite as cool as some of the Saints ones, but hey, the Saints have been around longer so this is a pretty fresh start. A little local color, ya heard?

The shirts are $22, and you can buy them in the store at 5704 Magazine or online here at Dirty Coast.

AT THE SAME TIME. That’s multi-talented. That’s Chris Paul.

This Mardi Gras version of the new CP3 II released in New Orleans over the weekend. The shoes are supposed to release nationwide on March 14, in many other colorways. Click the link for more pics of the shoe. I don’t know, I gotta say there is a lot going on on that sneaker, but the swirls do remind me of Mardi Gras.

Speaking of which, Chris Paul and James Posey were spotted wandering about the Uptown parade route yesterday. Here’s the thread on Hornets Report with the pics. I personally think it  is 100% awesome to see the team out and about in the city, rather than lying low in Kenner or something. (LAME! But then, you all know I love being in New Orleans and wouldn’t live outside the city limits if you paid me!) See CP3 trying to be all crafty in that photo… whatev, you aren’t fooling me. I went to college and I know a good cup hide when I see one.

As many of you all know, TT6 and I have been busy during Mardi Gras, parading, carousing, and such.  Plenty of celebrities in town.  Kid Rock pointed at us.  We caught beads and doubloons from Val Kilmer.  But our biggest surprise was meeting Axl Rose and his mate, Buckethead, and finding out that Axl is a huge basketball fan, who despite calling L.A. home,  knew a lot about the Hornets, and the NBA in general.  It was obvious he’d been out partying a bit, but was interesting, nonetheless.  Here’s how it went:

Hornets Hype: so you say you’ve watched several Hornets games this seasor.  Do you feel like our team is underachieving?

Axl Rose: They’re Scraped.  Some may convince you no one can break through; I’m here to tell you you’re worth more than they tell you.

Hornets Hype: I agree.  I agree.  What about this whole Tyson Chandler trade thing?  Any comment on that?

Axl Rose:  You’ll be Better.  [Swaying a bit.]  So bittersweet this tragedy; won’t ask for absolution.  A twist of faith, a change of heart, . . . a broken heart provides the spark for . . .  determination.

Hornets Hype:  Yeah, I think TC will come back strong too.  How about that Chris Paul?  Can you believe he wasn’t MVP last year, or being given more consideration this year for the same?  Do you think he thinks about that?

Axl Rose: Shackler’s Revenge, man.  CP got a wicked demon, his hunger never fades.

Hornets Hype:  Okay.  Sure.  Can you believe he almost didn’t start the All-Star Game this year?

Axl Rose:  Chinese Democracy.  It don’t really matter.  Gonna find out for yourself.

Hornets Hype:  Umm, right, so he looked great in that game, though, right?

Axl Rose:  If The World.  If the world would end today and all the dreams we had would all just drift away, you know there’s nothing more to say.

Hornets Hype:  [Hand over mike, muffled voices.]  Enjoying Mardi Gras, Axl?

Axl Rose:  Sorry.  You don’t know why I won’t act the way you think I should.

Hornets Hype:  What?

Axl Rose: Riad N’ The Bedouins.  Had a plan and thought they’d win.  But I don’t give a fuck ’bout them cause I am crazy.

Hornets Hype:  Well, any more thoughts about the NBA, maybe?  You know, the Lakers?  How do the we stop them come playoffs time?

Axl Rose: I.R.S.  Gonna call the IRS…read it baby with your morning new, with a sweet hangover, and the headlines too.

Hornets Hype:  you’re suggesting the Lakers don’t pay their taxes.  Or maybe Phil?  Seriously?  Any on-court suggestions?

Axl Rose: [Does slithering snake-like move.]

Hornets Hype: What do you think of Lebron?  Everyone likes to talk about him.

Axl Rose: Prostitute.  Oh I got a message for you.  Up and away.  It’s what I gotta do.

Hornets Hype:  Well thanks for talking, I guess.  Any parting thoughts?

Axl Rose: Patience. Anything Goes.  Knockin’ On Heaven’s Door.

Hornets Hype:  Okay.  Laissez les bon temps rouler!

And that was it.  Axl and Buckethead walked away after that.  Buckethead was wearing a Popeye’s bucket on his head for the occasion, not the regular KFC one.  Peace out.  Beat the Kings!

So. How was your week?

You wish there was a moment to stop and take a breath, but it’s the Lakers up tonight, the Jazz tomorrow, Mardi Gras in full effect till Tuesday. On the other hand, I’ll argue that we learned things about this team in the whirlwind of the past three crazy days. And they are good things.

We watched as, instead of collapsing, the Hornets won two games in the wake of the Chandler trade.

We learned who the leaders are. True, it wasn’t really surprising. But we saw David West speak up. (If there’s any word to describe D-West, outspoken is not it.) On a night when the Hornets organization seemed to be bombarding the fans and the press with cheerfully spun declarations about how they traded for two shorter guys to improve their rebounding, he was the one voice to say that the trade wasn’t a basketball decision, and he wasn’t happy with a move that would seriously handicap their playoff chances. I will always admire him for that. We saw Chris Paul tell the press, “Me and D-West talked about it before the game last night — if we go down, we’ve got to go down fighting.” And we were heartened by it.

We learned that the fans of New Orleans, despite comments to the contrary, are going to support this team, coming close to selling out the arena on a parade night with many fans bitter about what they saw as purely a cost-cutting move. And those fans were treated to a late Christmas present.

We learned that, when implemented wisely, the Hornets’  assortment of backup bigs can stand up to Dwight Howard. I don’t know what that says about other future games, but it’s not a bad thing.

We learned that, once every few months at least, John DeShazier and I will agree on something. I know, right?

We learned that we will follow Chris Paul wherever he leads us. And so will this team.

I’m not going to worry about the whole failing-the-physical thing right now, because there’s no point. Let’s focus on the short term. Tyson is the guy we have. And he says he’ll be back Monday or Wednesday. That’s enough for me.

What the Hornets got Wednesday night was one last chance to get it done with the guys on this roster.

They have to take it.